Umrah - a show or an ibadah

Question:

I have a question in relation to an issue i am facing. Quite often, i get asked when i am planning to perform Umrah, or to visit Saudi Arabia. In my culture and family, its common for families to perform Umrah regularly -perhaps on a year/bi-yearly basis.

Alhamdulilah, i have completed my Hajj Fardh and have done Umrah. Thus, if i save for example, £500 in my salary i keep in in my account for maybe:

a. Saving a house deposit or emergency

b. Save towards investing in projects for my parents (Doing a new kitchen bathroom etc for them)

Often, i feel pressured in going to Umrah by getting asked, or seeing family go regularly - some of which have had their Umrah's paid.

This has often seen me get into arguments saying that for me, there is no need to go (as i am looking after my family).

My questions are:

a. Am i doing the correct thing by taking these bills for my parents and deliberately not going Umrah

b. How can i avoid these argumentative situations with family as at times i feel quite upset and feel low about

Please advise me in light of the Prophetic Way.

Answer:

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.

It is encouraging to note that Allah gave you the tawfeeq to perform Hajj and Umrah. Thank Allah for such a blessing and make duā to Allah that He constantly blesses you with such a virtue throughout your life.

It is also encouraging to note your family’s zeal to perform Umrah regularly. However, remind the family of ikhlaas and the sincerity of a person’s intention. Rasulullah Sallallahu ‘Alayhi Wasallam mentioned in a Hadith:

يَا أَيُّهَا النَّاسُ، إِنَّمَا الأَعْمَالُ بِالنِّيَّةِ، وَإِنَّمَا لِامْرِئٍ مَا نَوَى، فَمَنْ كَانَتْ هِجْرَتُهُ إِلَى اللَّهِ وَرَسُولِهِ، فَهِجْرَتُهُ إِلَى اللَّهِ وَرَسُولِهِ، وَمَنْ هَاجَرَ إِلَى دُنْيَا يُصِيبُهَا أَوِ امْرَأَةٍ يَتَزَوَّجُهَا، فَهِجْرَتُهُ إِلَى مَا هَاجَرَ إِلَيْهِ

'O people! The reward of deeds depends upon the intentions, and every person will get the reward according to what he has intended. So, whoever emigrated for Allah and His Apostle, then his emigration was for Allah and His Apostle, and whoever emigrated to take worldly benefit or for a woman to marry, then his emigration was
for what he emigrated for."[1]

Whilst performing Umrah regularly is a great bounty of Allah, it should never be a means of priding oneself. If there is a fear that performing excessive Umrah etc. will become a status position in the family and friends, then caution people against that. If there is no ikhlaas, the time, effort, and all the ibādāt performed in Umrah will be wasted.

It is also against the etiquettes for people constantly performing Umrah to repeatedly ask questions to others as that could be a form of show rather than encouragement. It is due to these minute flaws in character that leads a person’s deeds to the trash bin. The Prophet Sallallahu ‘Alayhi Wasallam mentioned:

الْكِبْرُ بَطَرُ الْحَقِّ، وَغَمْطُ النَّاسِ

Arrogance means ridiculing and rejecting the Truth and despising people."[2]

He further mentioned:

مَنْ مَاتَ وَهُوَ بَرِيءٌ مِنْ ثَلاَثٍ: الكِبْرِ، وَالغُلُولِ، وَالدَّيْنِ دَخَلَ الجَنَّةَ

"Whoever dies and he is free of three: Kibr (Pride), Ghulul (goods stolen from the spoils of war), and debt, he will enter paradise."[3]

Another point to take into consideration is that Umrah –although very virtuous – is a nafl act; whereas the servitude of one’s parents is an obligatory and fardh act. It is a great duty and obligation on every person to look after their parents, especially when they attain old age. The rights of the parents cannot be infringed due to one’s honor and pride. They are greatly emphasized upon in the Qurān and Ahādīth. Allah Ta’ālā mentions in the Qurān:

وَقَضَى رَبُّكَ أَلَّا تَعْبُدُوا إِلَّا إِيَّاهُ وَبِالْوَالِدَيْنِ إِحْسَانًا إِمَّا يَبْلُغَنَّ عِنْدَكَ الْكِبَرَ أَحَدُهُمَا أَوْ كِلَاهُمَا فَلَا تَقُلْ لَهُمَا أُفٍّ وَلَا تَنْهَرْهُمَا وَقُلْ لَهُمَا قَوْلًا كَرِيمًا (23) وَاخْفِضْ لَهُمَا جَنَاحَ الذُّلِّ مِنَ الرَّحْمَةِ وَقُلْ رَبِّ ارْحَمْهُمَا كَمَا رَبَّيَانِي صَغِيرًا (24) رَبُّكُمْ أَعْلَمُ بِمَا فِي نُفُوسِكُمْ إِنْ تَكُونُوا صَالِحِينَ فَإِنَّهُ كَانَ لِلْأَوَّابِينَ غَفُورًا

And your Lord has decreed that you not worship except Him, and (show) good treatment to parents. Whether one or both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to them [so much as], "uff," and do not repel them but speak to them a noble word. And lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy and say, "My Lord, have mercy upon them as they brought me up [when I was] small." [Bani Israa’il 23/24][4]

If this is your situation, then serving your parents will be given preference to over the performance of Umrah. If you are encountered by your family and put under pressure to perform Umrah, you may simply stay quiet and ignore their baseless comments. You know what you are doing is right and there is no need in justifying your actions to people. Your deeds will be judged by Allah alone on the day of judgement and no one else.

And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best

AbdulMannan Nizami

Student Darul Iftaa
Chicago, IL, USA

Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.

www.daruliftaa.net

[1] حَدَّثَنَا أَبُو النُّعْمَانِ، حَدَّثَنَا حَمَّادُ بْنُ زَيْدٍ، عَنْ يَحْيَى بْنِ سَعِيدٍ، عَنْ مُحَمَّدِ بْنِ إِبْرَاهِيمَ، عَنْ عَلْقَمَةَ بْنِ وَقَّاصٍ، قَالَ: سَمِعْتُ عُمَرَ بْنَ الخَطَّابِ رَضِيَ اللَّهُ عَنْهُ، يَخْطُبُ قَالَ: سَمِعْتُ النَّبِيَّ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ يَقُولُ: «يَا أَيُّهَا النَّاسُ، إِنَّمَا الأَعْمَالُ بِالنِّيَّةِ، وَإِنَّمَا لِامْرِئٍ مَا نَوَى، فَمَنْ كَانَتْ هِجْرَتُهُ إِلَى اللَّهِ وَرَسُولِهِ، فَهِجْرَتُهُ إِلَى اللَّهِ وَرَسُولِهِ، وَمَنْ هَاجَرَ إِلَى دُنْيَا يُصِيبُهَا [ص:23] أَوِ امْرَأَةٍ يَتَزَوَّجُهَا، فَهِجْرَتُهُ إِلَى مَا هَاجَرَ إِلَيْهِ»

[صحيح البخاري، كتاب الحيل، ج٩، ص٢٢، دار طوق النجاة]


[2] وَحَدَّثَنَا مُحَمَّدُ بْنُ الْمُثَنَّى، وَمُحَمَّدُ بْنُ بَشَّارٍ، وَإِبْرَاهِيمُ بْنُ دِينَارٍ، جَمِيعًا عَنْ يَحْيَى بْنِ حَمَّادٍ، قَالَ ابْنُ الْمُثَنَّى: حَدَّثَنِي يَحْيَى بْنُ حَمَّادٍ، أَخْبَرَنَا شُعْبَةُ، عَنْ أَبَانَ بْنِ تَغْلِبَ، عَنْ فُضَيْلٍ الْفُقَيْمِيِّ، عَنْ إِبْرَاهِيمَ النَّخَعِيِّ، عَنْ عَلْقَمَةَ، عَنْ عَبْدِ اللهِ بْنِ مَسْعُودٍ، عَنِ النَّبِيِّ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ قَالَ: «لَا يَدْخُلُ الْجَنَّةَ مَنْ كَانَ فِي قَلْبِهِ مِثْقَالُ ذَرَّةٍ مِنْ كِبْرٍ» قَالَ رَجُلٌ: إِنَّ الرَّجُلَ يُحِبُّ أَنْ يَكُونَ ثَوْبُهُ حَسَنًا وَنَعْلُهُ حَسَنَةً، قَالَ: «إِنَّ اللهَ جَمِيلٌ يُحِبُّ الْجَمَالَ، الْكِبْرُ بَطَرُ الْحَقِّ، وَغَمْطُ النَّاسِ»

[صحيح مسلم، ج١، ص٩٣، دار الحياء التراث]

[3] حَدَّثَنَا قُتَيْبَةُ، قَالَ: حَدَّثَنَا أَبُو عَوَانَةَ، عَنْ قَتَادَةَ، عَنْ سَالِمِ بْنِ أَبِي الجَعْدِ، عَنْ ثَوْبَانَ قَالَ: قَالَ رَسُولُ اللهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ: مَنْ مَاتَ وَهُوَ بَرِيءٌ مِنْ ثَلاَثٍ: الكِبْرِ، وَالغُلُولِ، وَالدَّيْنِ دَخَلَ الجَنَّةَ.

وَفِي البَاب عَنْ أَبِي هُرَيْرَةَ، وَزَيْدِ بْنِ خَالِدٍ الجُهَنِيِّ

[سنن الترمذي ت بشار، ج٣، ص١٩٠، دار الغرب الاسلامي]

[4] [سورة بني اسرائيل، الآية ٢٣-٢٤]

حَدَّثَنَا مُحَمَّدُ بْنُ كَثِيرٍ، أَخْبَرَنَا سُفْيَانُ، عَنْ حَبِيبِ بْنِ أَبِي ثَابِتٍ، عَنْ أَبِي الْعَبَّاسِ، عَنْ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ عَمْرٍو قَالَ: جَاءَ رَجُلٌ إِلَى النَّبِيِّ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ فَقَالَ: يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ، أُجَاهِدُ؟ قَالَ: «أَلَكَ أَبَوَانِ؟» قَالَ: نَعَمْ، قَالَ: «فَفِيهِمَا فَجَاهِدْ»، قَالَ أَبُو دَاوُدَ: " أَبُو الْعَبَّاس هَذَا الشَّاعِرُ: اسْمُهُ السَّائِبُ بْنُ فَرُّوخَ "

[سنن أبي داود، ج٣، ص١٧، المكتبة العصرية]

حَدَّثَنِي سُلَيْمَانُ، حَدَّثَنَا شُعْبَةُ، عَنِ الوَلِيدِ، ح وَحَدَّثَنِي عَبَّادُ بْنُ يَعْقُوبَ الأَسَدِيُّ، أَخْبَرَنَا عَبَّادُ بْنُ العَوَّامِ، عَنِ الشَّيْبَانِيِّ، عَنِ الوَلِيدِ بْنِ العَيْزَارِ، عَنْ أَبِي عَمْرٍو الشَّيْبَانِيِّ، عَنِ ابْنِ مَسْعُودٍ رَضِيَ اللَّهُ عَنْهُ: أَنَّ رَجُلًا سَأَلَ النَّبِيَّ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ أَيُّ الأَعْمَالِ أَفْضَلُ؟ قَالَ: «الصَّلاَةُ لِوَقْتِهَا، وَبِرُّ الوَالِدَيْنِ، ثُمَّ الجِهَادُ فِي سَبِيلِ اللَّهِ»

[صحيح البخاري، ج٩، ص١٥٦، دار طوق النجاة]

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